While he has reached great success as an athlete it was his story of growing up that brought back many memories. Specifically, the treatment he received from others. He refers to kids calling him stupid and making fun of those things in his ears. I remember well those kinds of comments and many more including “you talk funny”.
While the experiences of Derrick Coleman and mine were very similar there was one difference. He put on a pair of pantyhose over his hearing aids to protect them and hold them in place. Being a bit older than Derrick the hearing aids I wore as a kid were held in the chest pocket of my shirt with cords running up to my ear pieces. Thus when I played football I could not wear my hearing aids. I had to rely 100% on lip reading.
Due to shyness at being seen with these hearing aids on and being very active in sports I often did not wear them at all. As a result, as Derrick talks about, you do not enjoy being around people and become very quiet. The memory that came most to mind after reading the article was a painful one. Our city had a very competitive flag football league. I was the quarterback of the team and we had managed to win our league and advance to the championship game. A few days before the big game the coach called me aside and said he was removing me from the team. He explained to me that the other kids felt I was removed from them and aloof.
I was crushed. I cried as I told my Dad that night what had happened. It still hurts today as much as it did then. My Dad insisted that I be the bigger man and be on the sidelines to cheer my team on during the game, which I did.I tell this story because it is good to be reminded that there are quite often very good reasons why people behave the way they do. It behooves each of us to be understanding and compassionate. While we are most certainly entitled to our own thoughts regarding others, I can’t think of many circumstances when making hurtful comments is justified.
In my own case if I was given a do-over I would not change anything. God compensated me in so many ways I feel guilty. 
People ARE so cruel! My heart breaks for you as a young football player and more for the fact that those comments still bother you today – as they would anyone who was unfortunate enough to experience something like that firsthand.
ReplyDeleteI wasn’t there when that happened, but if I could have some sort of magical time-travel do-over… I would NOT take the high road. I would go right back to each day someone said or even thought something along those hurtful lines... and I would look them right in the eyes and channel the words and actions of Samuel L. Jackson (aka. Jules Winnfield) when someone pissed him off!
“There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin' that sh*t for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a m*erf*er before you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some sh*t this mornin' made me think twice. Now I'm thinkin': it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. .45 here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could be you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that. But that sh*t ain't the truth. The truth is, you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin' - I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd.” And then BLAST goes the .45!!
I know it’s not right… but I’d do it anyway.
I LOVE YOU!
OK I want to beat someone to death. Is that bad? Dad I read this with tears in my eyes then a ramped up blood-pressure and an overwhelming urge to grab a Louisville slugger and crack some skull.. I wish I could take that ever-present hurt away from you. The echo of what some a-holes said or did to you back in the day.
ReplyDeleteWhat your coach did by pulling you from the game was his ignorant and cowardly move because he was too chickensh*t to do what was right. You deserved to play and should have.
But in the master plan God was looking out.....who knows something tragic could of happened and changed your entire outcome....
We will never know....but like you said "God compensated you in so many wonderful ways".....like having 2 daughters that are willing to travel back in time and commit some serious violence!
I love you and I send you and all of those with deafness in their lives strength and prayer to rise above.
I LOVE YOU